Tuesday, April 26, 2011

A mother's love.....

How do I define a mother's love?  To what lengths would I go to in order to protect my child?  What would I protect my child from?  I ask this question as a mother sits in jail after telling her son to get rid of a car he used to run down and murder another human being.  And while I don't condone her behavior, I understand it.  I understand how you can so fiercely love your child that you don't want to see him or her suffer.  But what is the cost?  Her son has been charged with first degree murder which means he plan fully ran down and took the life of another young man whose mother is, I'm sure, beside herself with grief.   I also find myself thinking of an episode of Desperate Housewives.  When Bree Van De Kamp gets rid of a car her son drove while drunk and unintentionally hit an old lady and then fled the scene.  And I know, it's a TV show, but now that show has turned into a reality in my community.  So again, I wonder, to what lengths would I go to protect my child?  And are we really protecting our children if we keep them from experiencing things?  I mean, I think of my oldest daughter who has some difficulties and when I see her struggle with things it breaks my heart.  When other kids don't want to play with her I want to swallow her up and protect her from that hurt, but alas, I can't.  I can't protect her from the world.  In fact, I think it's important for her to experience those things.  They build character and teach her coping skills and other valuable lessons...like not everyone is gonna like you. You are not gonna like everybody either, but you have to get along.  You have to learn to brush things off...have a thicker skin.  Understand that if someone doesn't like you, it's probably because of who they are in comparison to who you are.  And still it kills me inside to see her learn that.  But I can't protect her from it.  It's real life.  That's the way it goes.  And when she gets into trouble, she needs to take responsibility for it.  Even if it hurts her.  Even if I would trade places with her.  Those things teach valuable lessons.  And for some of us, myself included, we need to learn things through experiencing them ourselves.  I love my children.  I love them so fiercely and completely.  But allowing them to take responsibility for their actions is the right thing to do...even if it hurts them.  Even if I hurt for them.

"We do what we know how to do, and when we know better, we do better." -Maya Angelou

Wednesday, April 6, 2011

It's been a long time....

I feel like I started this process and then the wind sort of went out of my sails.  I felt for so long that I had so much to say....and then nothing....a dry spell.  So now I'm going to try to commit to posting something once a week...because even though at times I think I don't....I need an outlet. 

So much has changed.  The snow has disappeared off my lawn and all that remains is a small, dirty pile at the end of the driveway.  Purple had a birthday and is now 2...and showing all the signs of being 2.  And probably the biggest thing is that we said good bye to Green at the beginning of March and now we have a new friend joining us.  A 2 year old girl this time...which makes Purple and Red really happy.  So that's the update.

Now on to some real content....I've been thinking alot about the notion of Perfection and have read several blog postings and short essays on the subject.  And I wonder, how many of us really want to acknowledge our imperfections?  Are we just pretending to be "perfect" for others?  Or are we pretending to be "perfect" for ourselves?  Thoughts?

Wednesday, January 19, 2011

Kids say the darndest things.....

Life is funny.  And I'd like to believe that I am funny as well.  I have my moments definitely, but for the most part I think most people take all of this way too seriously and most people just need to relax.  That being said...no one can offer comic relief like a child.   That being said I thought I would share a compilation I've kept over the years of the funny things the kids in my life have said, including a few funny conversations as well as some of the countless mispronunciations I've heard over the years......feel free to share yours as well.

I took my youngest daughter, who was two at the time, into my work with me one day.  I work in a restaurant.
We were going to bring soup home with us for my husband.  My daughter proceeded to tell my co-worker that
"we were bringing soup home for her Daddy because he's souper!"

While riding in the car with my five year old daughter one day, she said to my husband, "Daddy when I am
sixteen you are going to be a grandpa."  My husband replied in a fatherly tone,  " I better not be."  My oldest
replied, " It's okay Daddy, I'll still love you."

One day this August, my oldest daughter was studying the words on my mom's bottled spring water and then
posed this question, " Grandma, why are you drinking spring water when it's summer?"

Me to child: "Do you know who Santa Claus is?"
Child: " Yeah, I know all about clauses."

Funny Misproniciations
Squawberry Winnie Meats = Strawberry Mini Wheats
Sangwich = Sandwich
Ruddfuckers = Fuddruckers
The ipsy ditsy spider = The itsy bitsy spider
Tooties and Tatters = Cookies and Crackers
Tapping = ice cream
Funder = Thunder
Mapkin = Napkin
Old Country Dufay = Old Country Buffet
Cuverd = Cupboard
Tinker toy = Canker Sore
Spageedo Bite = Mosquito Bite
Maazagine = Magazine
Spring Cheese = String Cheese
Tomanose = Tomatoes
Thinger = Finger
Noonie = pacifier
c by c by y =TCBY

Thursday, January 13, 2011

Cardboard boxes and boogers......

I LOVE downsizing.  Recently, throwing things away has become a hobby of mine.  Unfortunately, most of the other people in this house don't share that sentiment.  And both my daughters want to save every worksheet they've ever done at school, ever, which drives me nuts.  My husband has recently become addicted to Amazon.com.  And during the holidays I am fond of having all the gifts delivered to my front door.  For me, and who are we kidding I'm the most important,  it means no traffic, no parking lots, no malls (even though I work at the largest mall in the country, I tend to avoid the mall on all other occasions) no battling the crowds to get that really cool toy that is the talk of the season this year. I'm a fan of internet shopping. Remember, I like doing things the easy way.  But I am also a Target junkie.  And along with my husband's Amazon.com addiction, I have a problem when it comes to thrift stores.  So by no means am I perfect.....practically....but not quite.  So here's the issue I'm running into with this Amazon addiction.....the boxes.  Everything comes in a box, in a box.  At least 2 for every delivery.  There are boxes piled in front of my closet...which makes it hard for me to change my clothes....but at least with the gig I work M-F changing clothes is somewhat optional.  But now the box pile has spread to other parts of my room and is about half way to the ceiling.  It's really starting to drive me a little bonkers.  Shouldn't there be some sort of box limit or rule??? I think I'm going to fashion one....but I welcome suggestions.

On a different note, this winter has been filled with boogers.  I feel like I am wiping up boogers every 5 minutes.  Red and Purple both come with an endless supply of gluey grossness and I have gone through at least 5 boxes of tissues since Christmas between the 2 of them, myself and my kids.  We have been down with the sickness since November and I'm tired of it.  This has been a season filled with snotty noses, hacking coughs, endless sneezes, intermittant fevers, projectile vomit, and aching heads.  We haven't had a sick winter like this in a long time and I'm ready for the snow to melt and the grass to green.  Plus, I think we are all going a little stir crazy being holed up in the house.  I can't wait for the walking weather.  And now it's snowing.

Wednesday, January 12, 2011

Allow me to introduce myself.....

I am a Stay-at-Home Mom who does daycare in her home. I also work part time on the weekends at a restaurant that caters to girls ages 3-12 and their plastic/stuffed companions, which I understand sounds ridiculous, but it's one of the best jobs I've ever had and I love it. I like to refer to it as "the second happiest place on earth." (Disney World being the first). I mean, I get paid to celebrate little girls birthdays....few things are better than that.
I have three of my own children, two full time daycare kids, and two part time daycare kids. Oh, and a husband who works full time outside the home, because if he stayed here all day he'd go nuts.  I tend to take a common sense approach to being a mom and caring for children and I don't think that a child's misbehavior is a reflection on my ability to care for him or her. All people, adults and kids alike, are prone to temper tantrums, myself included.  I am not an overacheiving mom and I tend not to do things that go above and beyond unless I think they are fun for me, that might sound selfish, but keeping up with the Joneses just stresses me out and makes me not as good at my job of being a mom as I would like to be.  I don't like PTA meetings....I've tried....they are not for me. Kudos to the mom's who can run the school carnival or oraganize the bake sales or help on vision and hearing screening day...I'm not one of those.

Let me start by saying what this blog isn't.....It's not a place to find parenting advice or learn about what to do if you can't get your kid to poop on the toilet or eat all his green beans.  Rest assured your kid will eventually poop in the toilet or he'll stink. Oh, and those green beans? Maybe he just doesn't like them. No one forces you to eat food you don't like.  What this blog is...a place for me to vent and share my real life experiences being a mom and caring for other people's children all while maintaining a sense of humor and understanding that eventually all these little people I'm surrounded by will be the big people taking care of me when I'm old and can't feed myself.  There may be tips sprinkled in the mix, only because I am constantly looking for ways to make my own life easier, and on occasion I run into a gem that might help others have easier lives too.  And maybe I'm hoping to provide a little comic relief for all those other SAHM's at the end of their stressful days and sleepless nights and to let you know you are not alone....and maybe to feel like I'm not alone either.

Here on SAHdM.blogspot.com

Whenever I need to share or have something to say or vent about I will write. And I welcome any feedback my readers would like to give. 

One last thing.....
For the purpose of this blog and to protect the privacy of the children and families I care for...my own included....I've decided that I will refer to all of the children by color....
Yellow = My 10 year old daughter
Pink = My 8 year old daughter
Blue = My 5 year old son
Red = 3 year old daycare girl
Purple = 1 and 1/2 year old daycare girl
Green = 1 year old daycare boy
Orange = 5 year old daycare boy